Emotional Constraints Of Circles…How To Break Free?

circles-of-life

Playing in circles have been the games of children, the most memorable one – ‘I wrote a letter to my father, on the way I dropped it…’ Circles never release us even when we grow out of those childhood games.

Emotions define us and make us human but they weaken us, as they possess the power to drag us down and go round and round in circles.

Life itself is an uncanny circle, William Shakespeare described it so well in his poem “The Seven Ages Of Man.” Can you escape it? Can you separate the emotional aspects of spheres that keep entangling you?

Natural gifts of the sun and the moon accentuate the role of circles in our lives. Whosoever thought that a marriage can be solemnized by going around in circles around the holy fire (fire-deity) must have got inspired from these truths of nature.

They overlooked the fact that moon doesn’t appear to be in its form all the time and the sun is too hot, symbolic of the heat generated by a marriage. They also ignored that when a sun is enclosed by clouds, it becomes powerless.

When you go round and round in circles, you don’t reach anywhere. It can be very agonizing and frustrating. Nothing seems to work according to your wishes and plans.

Whether it is a marriage or a stressful relationship, a job that you can’t afford to quit or family affairs that make you go round and round, offering no viable solution, life can become a struggle.

“Round and round in circles we go, clutching at successes we never grasp, endlessly tripping over the same old failures. Truly, life is the misery we endure between disappointments.” – Joe Abercrombie

All you need is change but it could seem impossible, scary and grim. My friend Lisa Thomson often speaks about it and how liberating change can be. But there are caveats attached to life-changing decisions and they are not easy. Emotional restrictions raise their heads most fiercely.

The struggle continues and sucks life out of you every single day.

When stepping out of the circles is not possible, liberation from asphyxiating circumstances can be done in our own way by the following steps, one at a time. Remember – ‘a single step can make the longest journey.’

Acceptance: If you don’t want to change, you need to accept the fact. It would bring some mental peace and calmness in the charged atmosphere. Certain things never change. Some people refuse to accept their role in creating unpleasantness. Learn to find your strength and confidence by leaving them with their perceptions. You can never change them.

Set your standards: Live according to your own desires and principles. Don’t sacrifice yourself and your own happiness for others, whosoever they may be. Never feel fettered to the ground situation. Think positive and follow the sunshine. Dark clouds have to disintegrate one day.circles-of-life

Live life in your own way: Don’t get intimidated or influenced by the emotions of others. Do what seems right and start taking your own decisions. Nurture self-love for healthy mental attitude. Compassion for our own self is equally important. Stop accepting excuses.

Lower your expectations: You may remain your former self and let your goodness permeate your surroundings. Be positive but don’t expect anything in return. Let that message pass around to all who try to annoy you with their petty acts.

Nurture hope. If you don’t have any hope from people around you, if they have disappointed you each time, have faith in yourself. You deserve better surroundings and better opportunities. Eventually you will find them. Karma steps in you reward you for your patience and benevolence.

Life may be circular but its circumference keeps getting wider for us to grow.

I am sure you can relate to these circles of life. Have you tried to step out? I would call that a very valiant attempt. Getting off the merry go round and boarding it again is indeed intrepid. Please share your thoughts about it.

Thank you for reading this. Please add your valuable reflections, they are much appreciated.

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Balroop Singh.

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Freedom At Last

freedom

Walking uphill,
In search of my true self
Guided by the will to self-reflect
At last!
 
I follow the steady stream
Of consciousness, asking all the time
Is it the right time?
Do I need this?
 
Lost in tentative thoughts,
I fail to notice my mates
Lugging along,
Eager to offer succor
 
I tell solitude:
‘I have had enough of you
You can stay away
Let me move ahead.’
 
Determined to abandon distress
I ignore its presence
In the valley, on the side
Disregarding its alacrity to pull backwards
 
Tears refused to subside
They overpowered my spirit
I sat down in the company
Of my oldest confidants
 
Detachment and defiance at last
From the shackles of subjugation…
I soar freely with my new friends
To explore the wide world
 
Hope offered its camaraderie
Positivity promised to permeate around
Acceptance assured affinity
Confidence closed in compliant collusion!
 
© Balroop Singh
All rights reserved.

You can click on Sublime Shadows of Life by Balroop Singh to read more such poems.

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Thank you for your support. Please add your valuable reflections, they are much appreciated.

Lessons Of Life

Lessons Of Life

Visual effects were almost complete
Eyes half closed, one hand invisible
A dried tear, a veiled vanity
A relationship gone awry
The picture was ready…
 
The painter – a half winged bird
Struggling to fly yet feigning finesse
Besieged by promises
Eternal wait…. edgy encounters
Enigmatic appearance after ages!
 
Misty mornings of camouflaged hopes
Eerie silence, long walks
Through the woods
What is this place? So familiar!
Nostalgia is painfully pleasant
 
Emotional fetters couldn’t affect
Art and inspiration
Forgotten façade couldn’t fade
Memories of hypocritical love
And gratitude for lessons of life.
© Balroop Singh
All rights reserved.

You can click on Sublime Shadows of Life by Balroop Singh to read more such poems.

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Thank you for your support. Please add your valuable reflections, they are much appreciated.

Path That Haunts

Path that haunts

Drifting in and out of dreams
An alley…a pathway… a trail
So familiar yet so confusing
Always haunts…beckons to be followed.
 
With eagerness to explore it
Often tracked in dreams, deep down
It stirs the soul, irks the mind, entreats it
To walk the alley once more!
 
Could this unlock the secrets?
Could it put in perspective the missing links
Of a troubled, tempestuous life
That has been revealed through bizarre dreams?
 
Yet the trail is obscure, the quest to embark
Unfulfilled, looking for that alley… futile!
Meaningless search follows…
Were there wrong turnings?
 
Is it spiritual awakening?
© Balroop Singh.
All rights reserved.

You can click on Sublime Shadows of Life by Balroop Singh to read more such poems.

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It Was Not Just An Emotional Decision!

Not just emotional

Why I chose United States of America after retirement?

When people ask me why did you relocate to U.S.A, I have a very ready and simple answer…‘Strange is pull of your loved ones.’ Love is a dramatic driving force, the most powerful potion that we drink willingly.

When they ask how do I feel, I think about my blessings…I am nearer to my children and can meet them whenever I want.

My grandchildren don’t have to travel thousands of miles to hug me and then wonder why they live so far away. They would be having nice memories of their grand parents when they grow up.

I don’t have to wait to meet them and that too after a year or two.

Was it just an emotional decision? NO!

Emotions did play a significant role but little things do matter and so I would like to talk about those.

I admire my new surroundings for various reasons.

Healthy and fresh food:

I don’t know much about economic, health or security issues, which are universally relevant but I do know that the food which we buy here is much healthy and fresh, with all the nutrition labels, giving you the information what all you are going to consume. If I buy organic food, I don’t have to think whether it is actually organic. All kinds of cooked and ready to eat food are easily available for every pocket and palate.

DSC02277Landscaping and green cover:

When I look around how each and every empty space is aesthetically planned, kept clean and green, I get a reassurance that I have taken a good decision. Nature has always inspired and soothed me. Landscaping here doesn’t just look pleasing to the eyes; it also enhances our positivity, psychological and emotional well-being. I couldn’t have got better surroundings anywhere else. I just have to look out of the window to change my mood.

Discipline and courtesy:

People greet you with a smile, good morning or a hello when they pass by, instilling a feeling of goodness. Nobody stares or ogles at you! Nobody pushes you, the queues are most organized and people stand at a distance from each other. Nobody bumps into you and apologies are instant even if somebody happens to be in your way.

Road safety:

I-80_Eastshore_Fwy
No aggressive driving

Driving is stress free and most organized. People follow the rules and wait for their turn. Nobody drives aggressively, nobody gets into your way and lane driving is the norm, which is never flouted. You don’t have any fears that somebody might overtake or almost bump into your car from the side lane and scare you out of your wits.

Respect for pedestrians:

All vehicles stop for the pedestrian even when there is no intersection or zebra crossing. No driver expects you to stop and let him pass as the first right is given to the pedestrian. On busy streets, special road crossing devices have been installed to let the pedestrians take their turn to cross the road.

Respect for each other’s opinion:

People don’t shout you down and impose their own opinion on you. What you eat, wear and how you live is not anybody’s concern. Nobody intrudes into your privacy to comment on your body weight or sexual orientation. Peace and respect is a way of life here.

Peace:

Nobody honks. Even when you don’t happen to see within a second that the light has turned green. Nobody parks illegally. Handicapped parking is earmarked clearly in all parking areas and nobody flouts that rule. The dogs are well trained not to bark unnecessarily. No DJ’s, no loud music disturbs you at any time of the day or night.

Zero tolerance to littering:

You wont see even a little piece of paper anywhere in the parks, on the roads or anywhere near your home. In some areas where people don’t seem to bother, you could find a warning: $1000 fine for littering. Everyone respects the laws here or has to pay the penalty.

I have made some wonderful new friends. What more can you ask for? There must be more countries with such splendid amenities but this one suits me.

photo 2
Sky line from my window

Thank you for reading this. Your views are welcome. Please share them.

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Balroop Singh.