When Our Emotions Get Hurt…

People,detach

I am sure you can relate to this. We all have bruised egos, bleeding hearts and moments of discontent. Emotional upheavals are a part of our lives.

We have a lot of expectations from our near and dear ones, especially our parents, children, siblings and friends.

We love them and expect the same kind of love in return. We do the best for them and think that they would understand us. Many times they misinterpret our love as interference.

Our definition of love could be different from theirs. Their lack of interaction with us may disappoint us, we may wonder where did we err, which has made them selfish and self-centered and we may even feel guilty for having failed to have that kind of warmth we anticipate.

Too much love boomerangs. It loses its sheen. Our emotions get hurt.

At such moments, try to put yourself in their shoes. Just think that their perspective could be unlike ours.

I know it takes a lot of time to rise from the dumps of emotional distress…

The babies we nurtured are grown up adults now, emotionally and financially independent. They like to take their own decisions.

The parents who doted on them seem to be superfluous. You could be one such parent.

The siblings who shared all their secrets with us have their own soul mates and children, who are dearer to them than us.

We may feel isolated.

The friends we had have moved on with their life.

When situations change, attitudes also change. Emotional balance appears to be the most significant aspect of such a scenario.

How to handle emotional hurts?

Learn from hurts: We have to accept change, which is an inevitable law of life. All relationships evolve with the passage of time. Prepare yourself for change in the outlook of people around you. Please understand that their own life and pursuits are more important for them. They don’t mean to hurt you; they just have a different perception, which you may not appreciate.

Learn to trust them: Your contribution to the growth and development of persons in your life could have been gigantic but now is the time to sit back and take pride in their success and happiness. You can trust them to take responsible decisions. If they seem to go astray, you can only help them by reminding them but they will learn only when they stumble.Love you

Give up control: It may seem very difficult to give up the role of mentoring your children yet you cannot control them all your life. The sooner you realize this, the better it is for your mental health. Don’t give them any advice if it is not asked.

Let them be what they choose: The best gift you can give to your children and siblings is – let them be what they want. It may be against your own ideals and expectations but you cant snatch their happiness by imposing your view on them.

Support them: Despite the differences and bitterness, which creep into relationships slowly, don’t alienate yourself. Keep in touch and support their decisions. Give your opinion only when asked to. Remember you are no longer the most important person in their lives.

Respect yourself: If you feel alienated at some stage of life, step back and introspect. Let all the thoughts gather and sift the ones, which can help in getting over the hurt. Brooding or letting the past linger around you can only accentuate the ache. Let go the past, give it some time to wilt and wither. You will emerge stronger.

Cultivate emotional balance: Don’t get carried away by the attitudes, which could hurt your emotions, don’t try to be judgmental even if the indifference of a dear friend or a sibling is irksome. Learn to give them a benefit of doubt as your thoughts could be far fetched.

Find new activities: Keep yourself busy, join a club, a recreation center or revive one of those hobbies you couldn’t pursue. Spread your arms and feel free. If you are an introvert, take refuge in your old journal and share your feelings with it.

Nobody listens to our emotions as ardently as our journal.

“The turning point in the process of growing up is when you discover the core of strength within you that survives all hurt.” – Max Lerner

How do you deal with emotional hurts? I am waiting for your answers.

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Balroop Singh.

Learning To Smile

I hate to say I miss youlearning to smile
No tears can ever stream down.
These eyes now look at the sky
They find delight in your flight
Your smiling image looms large,
Tears recede instinctively.

Yet those promises haunt, hurt
I know you have forgotten them
I know you would never return
Your flight is beyond my reach.
Your selflessness, a far-fetched dream
Should I regret trusting my instincts?

If I ever meet you again
I’ll just look at your eyes
I will try to smile…
Smile and savor the moment
But we ‘ll live in our own world
A world devoid of anxiety and acrimony

The love that I hold in my heart
May have faded from your memory
Yet I treasure those mirthful moments
Of raising you with a smile
Of giving you wings to fly
You will forever be my dearest child.

© Balroop Singh.

You can click on Sublime Shadows of Life by Balroop Singh to read more such poems.
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How Emotional Vibes Of Colors Affect Our Personality

Color quotes

Colors have always fascinated me as they are directly linked to emotions. Bright and happy colors spread vibes of ecstasy all around. They accentuate our celebrations and merge into our moods.

Colors respond to emotions and moods intuitively. They lend a new perspective to our lives.

It has been our tradition to wear bright colors for happy occasions to add that extra merry tinge to them. Muted colors are chosen for somber occasions.

My fascination for colors started very early, as I liked to paint more because I could play with various colors, mix them and create my own wonderful shades.

Growing up with the colors of my little garden made me understand and respect their significance. Watching flowers and butterflies was my favorite past time. Much of my love for nature is connected with the colors.

When Leigh Hunt said, ‘Colors are the smiles of nature’, he must have felt the emotional vibes of colors.

I learned to smile from colourful flowers, the rainbow and the sunset.

Colors of nature are more alluring as their hues change in the most natural manner.

Have you noticed the colors of the sky and the clouds…the dawn, the dusk and the dark clouds?

Gray may be a drab color but it keeps us riveted till thunder and lightening shake us out of our reflections. Its association with rain makes it all the more meaningful.

Gray also defines our romantic temperament!

Green, the most soothing and harmonious color binds us with Mother Nature. It emits positive vibes of growth, giving, prosperity and all embracing emotion. The exquisite attachments it creates are eternal!

I wonder how it fell into the hands of jealousy. Shakespeare’s ‘green-eyed monster’ doesn’t relate to the upbeat vibes of green color.

color quoteBlue color carries the vastness of the sky and the depth of the oceans, it breathes serenity and contentment and its shades merge all the emotions of fear, hope and trust.

Blue evokes divine blessings and infuses us with unflinching confidence when we say… ‘Sky is the limit’!

“Red is such an interesting color to correlate with emotion because it’s on both ends of the spectrum. On one end you have happiness, falling in love, infatuation with some one, passion, all that. On the other end, you’ve got obsession, jealousy, danger, fear, anger and frustration.” – Taylor Swift

Red has been my favorite color… how it got associated with danger, fear and anger is difficult to understand as red roses symbolize love and passion.

It is the most vibrant color that helps us thrive, the color of our blood, symbolic of life and energy.

A bride in Asian countries wears Red, which is the color of celebrating new sensitivities and relationships.

Red carpet welcome denotes honor, respect and grand reception but at the same time a red card or a red flag changes the whole vibrational frequency of this color!

The meaning and significance of many colors change according to places, cultures and circumstances.

The paradoxical uses of white are amazingly enigmatic.

White may be a color of purity, faith and innocence but it is worn at the weddings as well as funerals!

Black is as perplexing as white as it represents different meanings for people, occasions and cultures. A symbol of grief, it is also preferred for formal parties with great penchant.

When the night is black, the silvery white moon illuminates it with its unique color…its emotional appeal reaches many hearts and inspires the poets!

Yellow and orange, the beautiful colors of fall, of Sun and sunshine… a symbol of love, happiness, hope and heat. They blend into the blue to create a heavenly mesmerizing scene at the beginning and end of each day.

Ironically, they are also associated with fire, denoting danger but it was fire that introduced man to new avenues of progress.

Do you know we have only three primary colors? Red, yellow and blue.

All other colors are created from the combination of these colors. They are mixed and muted to create various shades for summer, winter and spring.

Do you know colors can change our emotional responses and our appearance? They can make us look happy or sad, heavier or lighter, romantic or boring!

If you want to see a riot of colors, visit India. Some of the states like Rajasthan, 532740_10150932713366007_1354189198_nPunjab and Gujarat are a living example of the brightest outfits, worn without any second thought.

Tulip gardens too present an outstanding specimen of how much colors attract us and affect our emotions.

What are your favorite colors? I have always loved the shades of pink and red and magenta. They keep me buoyant all the time!

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Thank you for your support. Please add your valuable comments, they are much appreciated.

Balroop Singh.

My Mother

Mother's Day

She watched me grow with glowing face
Who walked with me, at my pace
Her tranquil touch taught tenderness
Whose sweet smile brought togetherness!

She always ran to cushion my fall
Who responded at my every call
She smooched away all my fears
Who whispered endearing words into my ears!

She shed tears of joy at my little feats
Whose heart with my achievement beats
She added veracity and color to my dreams
Whose lilac love in my eyes gleams!

She sat by my side silently at night
Who apprised me with my future bright
She could even understand my defiance
Whose pride glimmered in my triumph!

She gave me wings and watched in delight
Who never thought of her own flight
She loves me beyond measure, I know
She sacrificed for me all her glow

She lives in the smile of every flower
Whose sweet shade pervades this bower
I return to it, to feel her presence
To live her laughter, in the real sense

Her sweet smile still beckons me
Nostalgia often grips me to see…
A mother’s love is the true treasure
Only now do I understand in full measure.
© Balroop Singh.

Inspired from real life, this is one of my recent poems. You can click on Sublime Shadows of Life by Balroop Singh to read more such poems.

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