This post is inspired from Pragalbha’s question at Infinite Living: “What are the most memorable compliments given to you?” (Thank you Pragalbha and Debby at ThoughtSmith for the inspiration.)
Memorable words? We often forget the good ones, as they are rare. But we yearn for them. I learned the power of words very early in life. I knew they could bore unseen holes in our heart, knifing deeper hurts that keep festering.
I learned to live with them; also hurl some back at those who deserved them. Then I met some loving persons, with divine streaks. I discovered the path to positivity. My confidence doubled. I stopped paying attention to judgmental people, I steered away from toxic persons around me and decided to change my perception.
Then I learned forgiveness. It was not easy; I had to pass through the cauldron of each negative thought, each unseemly word that refused to quit the crevices of my mind. Forgiveness fairy would visit me every night to caress my hair. She taught me how a kind word sends vibes of love, if we are perceptive, if we know how love permeates and proliferates with this little gesture.
She told me: We give a little kindness when we pay attention. We give a little hope when we listen patiently.We give respect by communicating honestly. We give a gentle message with our tender touch.
I understood the power of touch when one of my colleagues said: “When you hold hands while talking, it seems you are really listening to me. I like it so much.” Those words stayed with me.
“You have time for everyone,” another one said. The words warmed my heart. Who doesn’t know the paucity of time specially when you are young, you know somebody is waiting at home and rushing becomes your second nature; when you are juggling with so many roles: A home-maker, a wife, a mother, a teacher, a mentor, a colleague and a friend.
Patient listening and responding with whatever kind words I could manage became my habit.
But the best compliment that I received indirectly from a friend is: “You have to peep into her heart to know her.” She was asked how could she be friendly with me!
Frowned at by most of my colleagues for keeping distance from them, I was considered to be “an arrogant” but only few who tried to come closer, understood the walls that I had erected around me to keep the arrows of words away.
On the first day of the New Year, I stepped out to see the change. Same sky, cloudless. No traces of much needed rain. Same sounds of cars whizzing past. Muffled faces. And then I saw him in the corner – HOPE! All bundled up, still shivering! I looked at him with expectant eyes.
“Procrastinator! Are you illusionary?” I sneered at him. He spoke to me:
“I know you love me I know you hinge on me When you tread on darker paths I know I inspire you.”
“And you take pleasure in elusive tricks?”
“ I have my constraints I float on the tide of time I possess no magic wand I hold a mirror to your ways.
“Sometimes I get caught In the currents of cacophony Discords and disharmonies Pull me down, make me dormant.”
“And so you walk out?”
“I am always around I whisper through the breeze I glisten in your heart I blend in your prayers.
This image, which I stumbled across accidentally at Pixaby defines the paths of life so well; colorful and joyous at places but an abyss in the center is always waiting to devour us. How we cross it depends on our acumen and proficiency.
As children, we only knew physical pain. We did feel hurt at times but it was absorbed within. We didn’t know it is called emotional trauma, didn’t know it could last longer and revisit us.
We didn’t know what is selfishness; probably constant reprimands helped us in refraining from any such acts. Sibling rivalry was overlooked, as we were unaware of in-depth analysis of behavior. Ignorance was bliss.
We only knew love and couldn’t discern hypocrisy of some people who exploited our emotions. Bullying was an unknown term; obedience was the answer even when hitting was intuitively disliked.
We didn’t have digital devices to quell our thirst of knowing more and believed in whatever our parents and teachers told us. Moral values were imbibed naturally through them. Stories of grandparents were enough for us.
‘Life is not a bed of roses’…this adage never seemed convincing to me when I looked around and saw from the eye of an immature, growing adolescent, with rosy dreams and soft thoughts… that all is well with the world…considering the small, protective cocoon that I lived in, formed those illusions.
The journey of life actually unfolds its reality when we step into this fiercely competitive, engulfing world; waiting to devour us, defeat all our sincere and honest efforts!
Some disappointments, some frustrations and disillusionments become a part of our journey.
Do we give up? No, we want to explore more.
As it becomes more meaningful and challenging; we learn to define our goals, snub some desires and struggle to move ahead with renewed vigor.
But it remains interesting.
Whenever we face the roadblocks, we wonder why is life so tough, why do we have to face a new challenge everyday, why can’t it be smooth sailing?
Sometimes, it seems that life is just a big vacation – when you nestle in the center of a place, surrounded by pine forests with snow covered peaks staring at you, …with whiffs of peace and contentment all around.
A serenity that coaxes us to slow down, to savor the little moments of joy.
Such a scenario changes our opinion, fills us with new enthusiasm to do something new, something different.
Have you ever felt this exhilaration? The illusionary aspect of life is a significant contributor.
Just look at the ocean, feel its vastness, sit by its side and look at the waves rushing at you. They speak to us, if we can understand the profound lesson each wave leaves for us:
Life is that simple yet seems complicated. However high the wave, it has to touch the shore and surrender. Everything meets a natural end. Every moment around us is so transient! All the hues of life merge into each other. None of them belongs to us.
Accept lifeas it comes, welcome all its ups and downs with resilience. Draw energy from positive thoughts and people. Dwell on your blessings. Keep your cool in the face of provocations and disappointments. Embrace your agonizing moments to exorcize them from your life.
Thank you for reading my reflections. If you liked them, please share this post at your favorite social networks.
I have been writing poetry, deriving solace from the spring, heralding change – a brilliant reminder that nature remains untouched despite the encroachments that have been made on her beauty.
The fiery touch of Corona virus that nature has sent to show who is in command, is just the beginning of a new era for mankind who didn’t bother to heed the warnings. William Wordsworth’s prophetic lines come to my mind:
“To her fair works did Nature link The human soul that through me ran; And much it grieved my heart to think What man has made of man.“
I’ve kept my cool by keeping my thoughts positive, by reiterating the message of the universe that nothing is permanent.
I’ve been listening to music more than the news to keep my sanity.
I come from the family of doctors and many of my dear ones are directly involved in the task of offering their services, I call them the soldiers of present times and salute all those who are fighting the monster called Covid – 19.
We shall overcome is the refrain that rings in my ears everyday.
Mother nature has been too kind, ‘we should never take anything for granted,’ we heard that phrase a thousand times but never paid any attention. We need to respect her message and her creation.
Remember, we are doing no honor to her. We are doing all this for ourselves, to save us and keep our dear ones safe.
After paying for our negligence, we would get another chance. That’s the law of nature. As a renowned urdu poet Sahir Ludhianavi wrote, “Raat bhar ka hai mehmaan andhera, kiske roke ruka hai savera…” (Translation: Darkness is just a guest of the night, who can hold back the morning?)
Emotional Shadows 