Memories are those endless treasures, which we can keep exploring till eternity and bask in their glory like a slow swinging hammock!
Like Ellen Hopkins, let me ‘open that bottle of memories they’re pouring out like wine, crimson and bittersweet.’
We can completely get immersed the moment they start pouring out!
Heartwarming memories, some sweet, some bitter and vivid, long-lasting and precious…unforgettable fond memories, haunt us if we happen to be sensitive as they have a profound connection with our emotions.
Some memories stand before us with extended arms, ready to embrace us lovingly…the first crush, those hands ensconced into each other’s, those amorous glances…that walk in the rain, huddling together…the touch of your new born child, the most precious possession…myriad such moments are stored effortlessly in the mind’s eye.
Happy memories yearn for those times to return, resist and resent change.
Unhappy memories are tenacious, they get entrenched in our minds retaining their ghost like exterior… they can tear us apart with their piercing, menacing eyes.
Repressed memories get embedded in the subconscious mind despite our best efforts to shove them out.
Sometimes I have to close that inward eye to stop the reel of memories so that they bounce back into the subconscious mind.
Sometimes I hear those loud voices…let go…forget the past…detach, I dump all those memories and choose only joyous ones yet they keep returning whenever the connection emerges.
One of my colleagues had a magical eraser, which didn’t leave any mark on the sheet. Sometimes I wish such an eraser could be invented to expunge unwanted memories from our memory bank!
Have you ever thought why certain memories keep coming back?
Have you ever wondered why certain facts, songs, statements or situations can be recalled without any effort whereas important information or textual details have to be read again and again to recollect them?
Psychologists have called the former as implicit memory and the latter as explicit memory
It is this memory, which is called implicit that holds our moments…moments of delight, of exhilaration, of accomplishment, of pride and countless such emotional instants.
We hold them in high esteem, clutch them as if they were the only possessions worth
keeping and derive pleasure out of them during our hours of solitude. We keep interacting with them till we realize their material nature.
They come with a large baggage, which we refuse to give up!
“Forgetting isn’t enough. You can paddle away from the memories and think they are gone. But they will keep floating back, again and again and again. They circle you, like sharks.” – Sara Zarr
They also come with some profound lessons if we are ready to discern and digest:
- Childhood memories are the strongest reminders of love and affection. Handle children with care.
- Don’t invest all your emotions in one person. Memories of such a person can drain you.
- Attachments are aching reminders of fond memories.
- Dwelling in the past is futile as it retrieves painful memories.
- All people we meet leave an impact on our life. Avoid negative people as much as you can.
- Memorable people affect us deeply with their qualities. They give us good memories.
- Earliest happy memories convey life-lessons of happiness and relaxation, which are picked up from parents and siblings.
Memories are like roses of various hues in their raw form, thorns are the natural attachments unless we scratch them away. I have embraced all the shades and tones and learnt from each one of them. I had no choice.
During the prime of our life we keep gathering them, unaware of the thistles, which start piercing us as we mature.
I have a very vivid childhood memory of a thorn, which pricked me, broke and got embedded in my finger. I came running to my mom, crying and wondering whether she could lessen my pain. She pulled the thorn out mercilessly, without caring to be soft.
I wish this memory too could have been pulled out as harmlessly as that thorn!
But memories are etched permanently on the canvas of our mind.
Do you have such memories? Have they been your learning experiences? I would love to hear your views.
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Balroop Singh.
Emotional Shadows 