If you have liked this poem, please share it at your favorite social networks. Thank you for your support. Please add your valuable reflections, they are much appreciated.
I have been learning for almost 8 years not to be judgmental.
I have tried quite hard to restrict my opinions.
Do I have to make such an effort even in case of my own sister?
She is one of the few persons with whom I speak out my mind, without thinking. She too?
‘Well, where did you pick up this word?’ I tried to tease her. She didn’t like my question. She reacted sharply as if I had assaulted her intellect!
Why are people so obsessed with words of appreciation all the time? Even our own dear ones, the nearest ones dislike an honest opinion!
Isn’t it good to have your own opinion? Many people resent that!
They want to hear what they think is right, thereby trying to change your opinion. The meek ones accept and learn to subdue their voice.
They want you to be guided by their own choices, their own likes and dislikes and may even stall your growth by keeping you away from forming your own views.
Is ‘judgmental’ a synonym of opinion, another question that cropped up instantly in my mind.
I went to thesaurus (so easy when it is just under your fingers) to understand this word better and found 42 synonyms of opinion.
Then my fingers danced over to dictionary and I found:
Synonym Study
Opinion, sentiment, view are terms for one’s conclusion about something. An opinion is a belief or judgment that falls short of absolute conviction, etc., are probably true or likely to prove so: political opinions; an opinion about art; In my opinion this is true.)
I have been trying to understand why an innocent and candid opinion is also construed as ‘judgment.’ Why are we so touchy about receiving opinions?
“If someone isn’t what others want them to be, the others become angry. Everyone seems to have a clear idea of how other people should lead their lives, but none about his or her own.” – Paulo Coelho
Opinion Molders:
An effort has always been made; in all ages by all societies to mold opinion yet there have been independent thinkers and revolutionaries who refused to be cowed down by fanatics, conformists and conservatives.
Social values, friends, communities and families control our thoughts.
While teaching students of an impressionable age, when they are struggling to break free from the unwritten decrees of society, I observed that 99% of them are guided by the opinion of their parents and cultural compulsions. They believe what is told to them.
Only few dare to form their own opinion, which gets molded much later in life and that too if they are not prejudiced.
Pre-judged assumptions of political and religious leaders reach us through media and advertising and they feed on our emotions, which can be easily swayed.
In an era of digital world where advertising barons and group discussions shout at us, it is easier to get influenced by what people are saying.
Why is it essential to nurture our opinion?
It defines us and our personality
It makes us an independent individual
It sets us apart from others
Society evolves with opinions or new beliefs
Opinions have always ushered change
Many times we are encouraged to keep our opinions to ourselves. I could never be guided by such well-wishers!!
If you don’t have an opinion, you can be easily manipulated. Some people love to do that.
Have you met such people? How strong is your opinion about people and issues?
Thank you for reading this. Please share your valuable reflections.
If you have liked this article, please share it at your favorite social networks.
You can click on Sublime Shadows of Life by Balroop Singh to read more such poems. If you have liked this poem, please share it at your favorite social networks. Thank you for your support. Please share your reflections, they are much appreciated.
Why I chose United States of America after retirement?
When people ask me why did you relocate to U.S.A, I have a very ready and simple answer…‘Strange is pull of your loved ones.’ Love is a dramatic driving force, the most powerful potion that we drink willingly.
When they ask how do I feel, I think about my blessings…I am nearer to my children and can meet them whenever I want.
My grandchildren don’t have to travel thousands of miles to hug me and then wonder why they live so far away. They would be having nice memories of their grand parents when they grow up.
I don’t have to wait to meet them and that too after a year or two.
Was it just an emotional decision? NO!
Emotions did play a significant role but little things do matter and so I would like to talk about those.
I admire my new surroundings for various reasons.
Healthy and fresh food:
I don’t know much about economic, health or security issues, which are universally relevant but I do know that the food which we buy here is much healthy and fresh, with all the nutrition labels, giving you the information what all you are going to consume. If I buy organic food, I don’t have to think whether it is actually organic. All kinds of cooked and ready to eat food are easily available for every pocket and palate.
Landscaping and green cover:
When I look around how each and every empty space is aesthetically planned, kept clean and green, I get a reassurance that I have taken a good decision. Nature has always inspired and soothed me. Landscaping here doesn’t just look pleasing to the eyes; it also enhances our positivity, psychological and emotional well-being. I couldn’t have got better surroundings anywhere else. I just have to look out of the window to change my mood.
Discipline and courtesy:
People greet you with a smile, good morning or a hello when they pass by, instilling a feeling of goodness. Nobody stares or ogles at you! Nobody pushes you, the queues are most organized and people stand at a distance from each other. Nobody bumps into you and apologies are instant even if somebody happens to be in your way.
Road safety:
No aggressive driving
Driving is stress free and most organized. People follow the rules and wait for their turn. Nobody drives aggressively, nobody gets into your way and lane driving is the norm, which is never flouted. You don’t have any fears that somebody might overtake or almost bump into your car from the side lane and scare you out of your wits.
Respect for pedestrians:
All vehicles stop for the pedestrian even when there is no intersection or zebra crossing. No driver expects you to stop and let him pass as the first right is given to the pedestrian. On busy streets, special road crossing devices have been installed to let the pedestrians take their turn to cross the road.
Respect for each other’s opinion:
People don’t shout you down and impose their own opinion on you. What you eat, wear and how you live is not anybody’s concern. Nobody intrudes into your privacy to comment on your body weight or sexual orientation. Peace and respect is a way of life here.
Peace:
Nobody honks. Even when you don’t happen to see within a second that the light has turned green. Nobody parks illegally. Handicapped parking is earmarked clearly in all parking areas and nobody flouts that rule. The dogs are well trained not to bark unnecessarily. No DJ’s, no loud music disturbs you at any time of the day or night.
Zero tolerance to littering:
You wont see even a little piece of paper anywhere in the parks, on the roads or anywhere near your home. In some areas where people don’t seem to bother, you could find a warning: $1000 fine for littering. Everyone respects the laws here or has to pay the penalty.
I have made some wonderful new friends. What more can you ask for? There must be more countries with such splendid amenities but this one suits me.
Sky line from my window
Thank you for reading this. Your views are welcome. Please share them.
If you have liked this article, please share it at your favorite social networks.
Landscaping and green cover:
