Tag: relationships

My New Book Explores The Connection Between Emotions And Relationships

Published on by balroop singh39 Comments

Are you emotionally healthy? Do you take pride in your relationships? Do you nurture your relationships with care? Have you passed the test of stormy weather that keeps knocking at our doors to warn us that relationships are brittle?

Many such questions keep cropping up in our minds.

Some of the answers bring an audacious awakening.

We wish we had known these questions well before facing a break up.

We wish we had the time and maturity to deal with our relationships.

It is human tendency to take all relationships for granted. Probably we pick that up from our basic relationship with our mother whose unaltered and unconditional love never fades.

We forget that relationships need care and attention; they require a constant sprinkling of sentiments to sparkle.

We forget that relationships are connected with emotions and the latter are extremely molten…flowing at will, just like an animate volcano or a stormy sea.

The sea of emotions keeps becoming wider and deeper if we don’t dive in to take stock of what requires attention.

The webby waves entangle us unless we learn to deal with them.

I have been floundering and learning every moment, often on the verge of emotional inhibitions. I have always emerged stronger. I have been sharing my thoughts and emotions with you for almost two years now.

It is time to launch a book on emotions.

emotional truths

Welcome to the launch of my third book.

This book will guide you how you can keep pace with embellishing your thoughts and channelize your emotions, which can be trained to veer into a positive direction.

This book will infuse a new thrill and vitality into all your relationships. Happiness will seem a real possibility.

Healthy relationships depend on emotional quotient and emotional balance, which can be nurtured.

Can we stop the flow and speed of emotions? Can we learn from their radiance, their cheerful bounce, their twists and twirls? This book unravels their depth and resilience in handling the stormy weather, which is knitted into the fabric of all our relationships.

We look around and feel – ‘Nothing is perfect’… dreams get shattered, hopes are belied; aspirations delude and the opportunities elude us. The clouds have the power to conceal the sunshine and our radiance fails to ignite positive thoughts.

This book will answer all those questions; give a new hope to your dreams and usher in a new dawn.

“I don’t want to be at the mercy of my emotions. I want to use them, to enjoy them, and to dominate them.” – Oscar Wilde

I am sure nobody would like to be at the mercy of anger, impatience and impetuousness, which play havoc with our relationships.

I am sure you would bless me after reading this book as it focuses on appreciation, calmness, emotional resilience and people.

If you have liked to be a part of this launch, please share it at your favorite social networks. I would like my book to reach all your friends.

Please click on the link:

You can download a FREE copy of this book for the next three days – from 14 August 2015 to 16 August 2015, midnight.

Thank you for your support. Please add your valuable comments, they are much appreciated.

Balroop Singh.

I Have Understood…

Published on by balroop singh12 Comments

Relationships

 

I have understood
The value of each tear
The pain of every reprimand
The depth of every sigh
Which deepens a relationship.

I have understood
The care of each moment
The delight of growing wiser
The sharing of those secrets
Leads to bonding of emotions

I have understood
The desire of birds to fly
The pride of perching high
The pain of separation
The joy of reunion

I wish I could also understand
Why relationships sour
Why friends turn hostile
Why emotions die
Why efforts to save them prove futile?

I know the day is not far
I know I have to explore more
Yes! I can see the mist retreating
My wisdom tooth is also almost upbeat
The weary wait is over and I retreat

My emotions have carried me too far
Its time to emerge from those caverns
And share what I have learnt…
Please wait!
© Balroop Singh.
This is a prelude to my next scheduled post, which I am holding till Friday. I know I don’t post on Fridays but you will understand when I share it. I am keeping the suspense and sharing this poem, which sums up my thoughts so succinctly about my next venture.

This is one of my earliest poems when I was just experimenting with this genre. You can click on Sublime Shadows of Life by Balroop Singh to read more such poems.

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Thank you for your support. Please add your valuable reflections, they are much appreciated.

Why People Get Disliked?

Published on by balroop singh24 Comments

Dislike

This question that I ask myself often may be having a thousand answers but none of them appeals to me. That doesn’t mean I have not disliked people. In fact my likes and dislikes have been quite strong and firm.

I have written about people and their demeanor earlier also. I have tried to study the behavior of people around me, without really making any judgment albeit they think the opposite.

I have also tried to understand what being judgmental is.

Isn’t it human tendency to observe, to think and to form an opinion? That is just what I have been trying to do.

If forming an opinion is being judgmental, then I am!

I know many people who must have disliked me. All those who exhibited it openly gained my appreciation. I consider my critics to be my well-wishers. I have learnt a lot from their dislike.

If you have never given a thought to getting disliked, then you are welcome to scrutinize the following reasons:

Candor:

We don’t share our view candidly because we know that candor is the root cause of getting disliked. So what if it makes us hypocritical!! Isn’t it an accepted behavior? I have always disliked shrouding…especially feelings and emotions. I discovered quite later in life that truth and transparency are expected but exploited and disliked. It is so self-harming that our honest and straightforward outlook can be easily manipulated to let us down.

Silence:

So is silence. Those who choose silence and consider it ‘to be golden’ offend others unknowingly. Silence is a mute weapon, which is much sharper than words. Lack of communication breeds dislike as it gives an impetus to imaginative thoughts. Bias or pre-conceived notions become the basis of forming opinions. It is therefore imperative to share our perspective on all those situations, which concern us and can harm relationships.

Arrogance:

It directly leads us to dislike because it is very difficult to have a pleasant interaction with arrogant persons who have the tendency of dwelling in self obsessed realms of exalted nature. Would you like being called inexperienced, ignorant and imprudent? Would you like to be intimidated and bullied into whatever they want? I am sure anybody who challenges our self-esteem gets disliked.

Body language:Dislike quote

Certain kinds of body language can be very offensive. People who don’t want to say anything directly convey their words through this language and get disliked. Eyes can convey dissent much louder than words. A smirk can speak volumes about what goes on in your heart. Just your posture of standing and looking can belittle others.

Disrespect:

Respect is the foundation of all relationships. You may get disliked despite your best efforts to nurture a friendship if there is lack of respect. Respect and like are two pals, which move hand in hand. When somebody constantly puts you down, when your positive actions are misinterpreted and ignored, it is a clear sign of dislike.

Pretensions:

A fake behavior is like a double-edged sword. It can work both ways, harming the pretender as well as the person who dislikes such charades. When we pretend to be kind and considerate, when we put up a mask of friendship to betray and when we lie to keep up the appearances, we eventually get disliked. Nobody around us is such a big fool not to see through those shams.

Bragging:

It may not harm anybody but too much of self-praise often puts us off. I had such a colleague who would brag about all her achievements loudly, forgetting that many of those were very evidently the result of team-work but she would go on and on, gloating in self-perpetuated glory, failing to notice the meaningful smiles on the faces of others.

Dislike in itself is the biggest monster, which strikes emotionally imbalanced individuals. Most of the times they don’t know how to handle their anger and angst and therefore their frustrations overpower them. Since it is so easy to shift the blame, their illusionary world of dislike widens.

“I don’t dislike my haters, they dislike me. I’m doing nothing wrong. I’m just being me.” – Jaime Lopez

It is better to convey dislike in clear words to convert it into a healthier emotion. It may hurt us for a moment but it also helps us in understanding and working on our imperfections.

Have you been disliked by others? Do you have any other reasons of dislike in mind? I would love to hear your views.

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Thank you for your support. Please add your valuable comments, they are much appreciated.

Balroop Singh

How To Enrich Your Personality With 3 Simple Values: #Consistency #dedication #sincerity

Published on by balroop singh35 Comments

Personality

When I think of impressive personalities, consistency seems to be the most important requirement. We may feel more detached and free in today’s world, dedication and sincerity may appear to be a bit outdated but they are still revered and valued.

Consistency of principles and conduct give a distinctive shape to our personality. When we don’t change our behavior in the midst of crisis, under pressure or due to threats, when the influence of circumstances doesn’t crush us or change us, we can call ourselves consistent.

Consistency in relationships is the key to happiness and serenity. All relationships need an assurance, an assertion and an affirmation that they can be banked upon. Consistency lends that much needed emotional mortar to firm our relationships.

Consistent parents raise happy and healthy children and make a positive mark on their ever-evolving personality.

Dedication and sincerity are the offshoots of consistency, which align our actions with our concepts.

“Consistency makes the rain drops to create holes in the rock. Whatever is difficult can be done easily with regular attendance, attention and action.” -― Israelmore Ayivor

Just consider what consistency can do:

  • Consistency of thoughts evolves us into a better person. Even if our thoughts happen to be negative at times, they are shoved away by being positive and consistent.
  • Consistency of beliefs leads us through the darkest tunnels of our mind. Trust speaks to us during those disappointing moments to focus on positive aspects of life.
  • Consistency of values makes us a luminous personality. It makes us as tall and as bright as the lighthouse. People notice that consistency and get inspired.
  • Consistency of upright behavior endears us to all our acquaintances and friends who know that they can pin their hope on us.
  • Consistency of affirmative outlook sends a positive message to all those around us.
  • Consistency of diet, exercise and meditation keeps us healthy and fit.

Despite all the good that consistency brings to our relationships, and us… nobody cares about it! Why?

It is probably very demanding.

Demands of consistency:

  • Our actions should be in harmony with our values.
  • We must uphold our principles in all situations.
  • We treat all people with the same respect that we expect from them.
  • We need to maintain our integrity even during difficult times.
  • We have to come up to the expectations of others.

Our actions reveal our values and principles. If we don’t follow them consistently, we give out a clear message that we are faking our relationships. It is our behavior that exhibits what lies within us.‘ Without consistency there is no moral strength’- Owen

Dedication and sincerity:

I know these two terms are quite discomforting. One day, when I was emphasizing on their importance, one of my students kept staring at me in a strange manner, very clearly conveying through his looks that I was going overboard and should come back to the topic, which had triggered the so called ‘sermon.’

I could never forget those looks!

Those looks followed me, haunted me yet they couldn’t deter me from talking about these values whenever I got the opportunity.

Consistency, dedication and sincerity can enrich your personality.

How they help:

My conviction is that it is our zeal, our passion for work, which makes us noticeable. Whether you are a homemaker, trying to make your home more comfortable and loving, an entrepreneur or an ordinary worker, dedication and sincerity gleam through your work.

My friend, we can call her ‘Sage’ was so committed to her work that she was the admiration and envy of her colleagues, some of them waiting in the grass to pull her down the ladder of success. That did not deter her from her path.

She didn’t change her personality to please others.

She didn’t worry about being disliked.

She became a source of inspiration for many young men and women who were aspiring to make a mark through their work.

She has got many accolades for completing all the projects within the stipulated time despite the challenges she had to face in the form of limited resources and lack of support.

All those who interact with her immensely esteem her sincerity.

“When pure sincerity forms within, it is outwardly realized in other people’s hearts.” – Lao Tzu

Sincerity is like ‘truth’, which gives more of pain and poise but has long-term effects.

Have you ever felt admiration and pride for some persons? In what way are they special?

Have you aspired to emulate those affable personalities?

Were you attracted by their pleasing traits? Which one impresses you the most? I would love to hear your views.

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Thank you for your support. Please add your valuable comments, they are much appreciated.

Balroop Singh.