Why Are Birthdays So Special And Emotionally Charged Moments

sleeping2-c-akirahbabe.blogspot.com_Every year there was a day when this girl waited for darkness to descend soon. She also waited for the house to be quiet and then she cried her heart out, silently, to her pillow. The sobs would not subside till she fell asleep.

She knew nobody is going to empathize with her tears, she knew nobody would even ask what was her problem. She had known that for eight years now and she didn’t expect any words of affection.

The sobs of this little girl would have never ceased if the Birthday fairy had not given her the assurances. She caressed her long, soft hair and sat beside her. She told her very softly that there would come a time when people around her would not forget her birthday. She assured her that this day was going to be the happiest day of her life only if she waits a few years.

This childhood fantasy gave great solace to her, assuaged her hurts and raised her hopes.

The first few lessons she learnt were that a girl can never claim to be equal… that birthdays are only for boys…that girls have no right to question certain norms of her society.

But she also learnt to think positive.

She kept her hopes and expectations to herself. She didn’t want to share them in the fear of getting disliked.

Conflicting emotions churned in her heart and mind, trying to balance out.

Seeing seemed more powerful at that impressionable age but she didn’t let those impressions entrench themselves in her. She took an inspiration from the subjugation and discrimination, which stared starkly at her face.

Her promises to herself kept getting firmer with each year. She learnt new lessons with each put down and her resilience grew to unimaginable heights. In fact it became an invincible part of her personality.

At least she had the freedom of thought, she told herself. At least she had the capabilities to distinguish between virtues and vices. At least she had the opportunities of learning, which many around her were deprived of.

All who live in neglect are not that strong, they have the tendency to drift into negative crevices. They learn to accept all the atrocities calmly.

All are not so positive and imaginative to have met the birthday fairies!

For her, birthday was just another day till she met her soul mate.

Were childhood dreams true or was this just another phase of life? – this question often reverberated around her.

Yes, a day did come when there was no dearth of flowers, cards and wishes around her on her birthday.

It followed year after year. Her husband made this day special for her in all the loving ways. Her friends, her students and her children added brilliance with their smiles and wishes.

Birthday was not just another day now. It ushered in new delight, even the sunshine seemed to be special!

Birthday Quote

All this could be possible just because she met an open minded man who let her flower into a luminous personality, who didn’t impose his views on her, who didn’t consider her to be another woman of his era but respected her.

Celebrating birthday of all the children of the house is essential as:

  • It gives them pleasant memories,
  • Makes them sensitive
  • They learn the values of togetherness and love
  • They grow up into cheerful and confident individuals,
  • Happiness of those little moments, which make them the center of attraction, is a learning experience for them,
  • Highlights the importance of self-love

We all cherish childhood memories; clutch them all the more as we grow up; they conjure up those moments of delight when we look at a familiar spot or a child we love… and the childhood yearnings return.

Birthdays are those landmarks, which evoke such memories. Some special emotions are attached to them…love, gratitude, respect, admiration, pride and honor are imbibed effortlessly.

Do you have any such memories, which are difficult to share?

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Balroop Singh.

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Walls Do Respond To Emotional Attachments – Home Is Where The Heart Is!

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It is quite natural to get attached to homes if we have invested our hearts into them. Even the walls of such homes become receptive.

Recently I happened to read an article, which stirred my emotions intensely and took me down the memory lane.

My dear friend Lisa Thomson says, “A house has no feelings or attachments. It doesn’t love us back. Walls really don’t talk, and that’s probably a good thing.”

We convert a house into a home when we get emotionally attached to it.

HOME THAT NURTURED ME:

The home in which I grew up is still very much a part of my ardent memories as this was the place that nurtured me from the age that was most impressionable.

The excitement of an eight-year-old child is still very fresh in my mind. I can smell the fragrance of new paint and wood even now. Whenever I go down the memory lane, I can experience the friendship of all the nooks and crannies that I explored the very first day I stepped into this house our father got designed for us.

This house cherished my dreams, cushioned my lonely moments, provided solace to my disappointments, gave shape to my adventures and inspired me to aspire high.

Every wall was a supporting shelter, how much I could share my thoughts with them, silently!

The walls of my room empathized with me when I didn’t sleep well due to examination fever. They rejoiced with me when I turned up the volume of my radio, to celebrate my little moments of joy. They resounded with my giggles in the afternoons.

As I grew up, every brick seemed so precious, every tree of the little garden I loved seemed to cherish my thoughts and provide solace to my distressing hours.

Then came the time to leave my treasured surroundings, my home.

I can still feel the tears of poignant parting on my cheeks.

I hate this age-old tradition of some countries – to leave your maternal home after marriage. The one who created this tradition must be a man for according to this orthodox convention, he doesn’t leave his home; he has the choice to continue living in it or sell it.

I thought I would keep coming back to my home whenever I wanted and I did during the initial years of setting up my new home.

It remains the epicenter of my dreams even now. All family get-togethers are hosted in this home even now… but in dreams.

I can no longer visit it in real life because it was sold…and that is another story!

love for home

HOME THAT DEFINED ME:

Despite all those attachments I had with that home, which remains the backdrop of all my dreams, I was pleased to find a new one that anchored me and promised myself to make it more loving than the one that had raised me.

A home cannot be built in a day…it encompasses in itself the dreams and the aspirations we hold close to our heart, the hopes that we gather with each passing day, the goals that we achieve together.

A home lounges on the care and affection we shower on each other, the time we offer to understand the needs and desires of a family, to live through the difficult times together and to support each other despite minor differences.

This home I acquired became my treasure house, a nest, which was filled with the babble of my little children and the love of my hubby. It accumulated and absorbed all the memories, all the celebrations and the moments of intense joy, of raising my kids and exult at their little achievements.

I have no doubt that even the walls around me shared my elation.

Time just whizzed by and before I could realize its pace, my kids grew up into fine individuals, ready to soar!

Now I could grasp the truth of this statement and what my friend Lisa has articulated: “Home is people. Not a place. If you go back there after the people are gone, then all you can see is what is not there any more.” – Robin Hobb

THE VOID:

Though my work kept me very busy and the walls of my home as welcoming as ever but time stood still.

A part of me seemed to have walked away with my grown up children.

Now I just clung to my home and the loving memories that were attached to them. I tried to make it warmer with more pictures of my family.

I have been trying to understand the ironies of this life, which provides natural attachments.

I have been trying to detach from all those people and homes, which hold us to ransom, extracting all our emotions.

I have moved once again from my home, into which I had put my heart and soul to be near my children.

Now I have double memories and none of my dearest homes – one got sold and the second lies locked with all those treasures I had amassed!

Do you have any such memories and attachments? Do they haunt you?

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Balroop Singh.

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This Fall

This Fall

The fall adds wings to my words
The soft swish of breeze carries them away
Floating down merrily, they smile at me
And dance around with glee.

The ‘J’ of joy, the ‘M’ of melancholy
The ‘S’ of solitude, the ‘T’ of twilight
The ‘H’ of hope, the ‘C’ of calmness
All merge into each other

Enhancing the beauty of brilliant decay
Colors of fall highlight each ray
Of sun to inspire thoughts of twilight
Of forbearance, of change, of new days

At night the frightening wind
Brings sweeping somber thoughts
Of chilly gusts, of lonely nights
A yearning yells at those sights…

To get away, to stay adrift, to disengage
All those memories glide softly back
Into those enclosed caskets
Never shall I excavate.

This fall I am burying them deeper
This fall is more buoyant, more blissful
The resilience rests on my brow
The happiness lives with me now

In my thoughts, in my loving home
In all seasons, even in this fall
It brings sweet memories of moments dear
My words fly now with the same cheer.

© Balroop Singh

You can click on Sublime Shadows Of Life by Balroop Singh to read more such poems.

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