Visages Of Joy

When you meet joy Joy
Even in that momentary experience,
This ephemeral emotion unravels
All those colors of contentment

Which sparkle from within,
Transcending gloomy alleys of angst
Spreading shimmering beauty
Which can keep gleaming around us

If we breathe it in, savoring soft sounds
If we gather those divine resonances
If we overlook the prickly peeves
If we revere this exquisite emotion

It can become a perennial stream
A vibrational intuitive sensation
An inward journey, a self-healing step
If we learn to tap into its enormous energy!

It can define the quality of our life
Which brings delectable delight
To divert our attention from
The real robbers – ambitions, aspirations

If we halt, if we look around
If we take a break, to relish life
To appreciate the aroma of living
To escalate the whiffs of joy.

© Balroop Singh.

You can click on Sublime Shadows of Life by Balroop Singh to read more such poems.

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Have you met joy? Please share that experience. Thank you for your support. Please add your valuable comments, they are much appreciated.

Can Women Escape Domestic Violence? An Emotional Approach…

Domestic Violence

My friend Lisa is writing a story on women’s escape from domestic violence. This post got an inspiration from her unstinted efforts to help ‘The Great Escape’.

Is it possible to escape domestic violence? I have often wondered…

If this could be probable, why would a woman of 21st century swallow everyday abuse, why would she compromise and be told to ‘ADJUST’! Adjust to intimidation and assault? To slapping? To emotional blackmail?

If this could be conceivable, why would female feticide be forced upon a young mother who yearns to hold her child in her hands!

Why would a woman be assaulted or killed for petty demands like dowry or standing up for her rights?

I know I am presenting a very negative picture despite being a robust optimist.

But I have seen domestic violence, its shapes and shades. I have seen it grow and flourish despite laws against it.

Domestic violence is not just perpetrated by a husband or a partner. Families too are a party to it. To my mind, violation of basic human rights by anybody around us – a parent, a sibling or a relative – is domestic violence.

According to National Coalition Against Domestic Violence ( NCADV ) Domestic violence is the willful intimidation, physical assault, battery, sexual assault, and/or other abusive behavior as part of a systematic pattern of power and control perpetrated by one intimate partner against another. It includes physical violence, sexual violence, psychological violence, and emotional abuse.

I have seen so many women in such situations. They don’t even think that a mistreatment in a family means domestic violence. They don’t have the courage and the confidence to confront it.

Not just a husband unleashes domestic violence upon her; his mother is more to blame for nagging, verbally and physically abusing, making her work like a slave and not giving her enough to eat.

This is the story of most of the homes in many Asian countries.

Real story:

I had seen this woman in my early childhood…working all day, carrying out all the odd jobs of the house, from looking after the cattle of the house to cooking for the family as well as all those who worked in the fields. My most vivid memories are of those days when it would be raining heavily and continuously but she would be as active as ever, with just a gunny bag on her head, attending to the milking of the cows, early in the morning.

Abandoned by her husband at the young age of 25, she chose to live in his home all her life, probably due to societal pressures. She devoted all her life to her only child and grand children, giving them all they needed, without even a single word of complaint.

As I look back now, trying to understand the definition of domestic violence, this image seems to be more disturbing than physical violence in the homes. This memory is etched in my mind. The emotional wounds that I can feel even today for my aunt, after almost 5o years are irreparable.

Even today I can hear that unspoken message…where can I go?

Even today I can see that agony in her eyes saying…what can I do?

Who is responsible?

Women too are equally to blame for accepting such a behavior. Fifty years ago when economic independence and social taboos didn’t let them take any action, it could be understood but in the present era when there are no such constraints, women accept domestic violence as part of their life and destiny.

The sordid saga continues…

Domestic Violence

Another real story:

She is a highly educated, successful doctor and financially independent woman. There was a time when she could take her own decisions, when she was single though many of her friends couldn’t.

She married according to her own wishes, having found her soul mate at the age of 20. She has been living with domestic violence of unspeakable volumes but could never gather the courage of reporting it, stepping out of her marriage or divorcing her husband. She is a widely travelled woman but cannot step out of her own home, without her husband.

People say women have been empowered and emancipated! Really?

“We live in a world in which women are battered and are unable to flee from the men who beat them, although their door is theoretically standing wide open. One out of every four women becomes a victim of severe violence. One out of every two will be confronted by sexual harassment over her lifetime. These crimes are everywhere and can take place behind any front door in the country, every day, and barely elicit much more than a shrug of the shoulders and superficial dismay.”Natascha Kampusch

Who can help?

No soft words or empathy, no laws or stern action against those who inflict such a cowardly act can help.

Only women, yes those women or victims who accept such a beastly behavior can help.

Unless you help yourself, all others effort go futile:

  • Refuse to tolerate domestic violence
  • Never hide it to protect your self-esteem
  • Stand up for your rights
  • Don’t equate it with destiny
  • Communicate your dissent the very first time
  • Speak your mind out loudly and clearly
  • Seek help
  • If the perpetrator doesn’t change, be bold
  • Never believe in their false promises
  • Never give a second chance to such offenders
  • Be firm and take your own decision
  • Walk out of such relationships as soon as you can!

Do you know that 603 million women live where domestic violence is not considered a crime!!

If you are living in a country that recognizes domestic violence as a serious offence, you must report it.

My dearest friend Kim supports this cause most vociferously at her website. You can visit her for advice and help.

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Thank you for your support. Please add your valuable comments, they are much appreciated.

Balroop Singh

How Emotional Vibes Of Colors Affect Our Personality

Color quotes

Colors have always fascinated me as they are directly linked to emotions. Bright and happy colors spread vibes of ecstasy all around. They accentuate our celebrations and merge into our moods.

Colors respond to emotions and moods intuitively. They lend a new perspective to our lives.

It has been our tradition to wear bright colors for happy occasions to add that extra merry tinge to them. Muted colors are chosen for somber occasions.

My fascination for colors started very early, as I liked to paint more because I could play with various colors, mix them and create my own wonderful shades.

Growing up with the colors of my little garden made me understand and respect their significance. Watching flowers and butterflies was my favorite past time. Much of my love for nature is connected with the colors.

When Leigh Hunt said, ‘Colors are the smiles of nature’, he must have felt the emotional vibes of colors.

I learned to smile from colourful flowers, the rainbow and the sunset.

Colors of nature are more alluring as their hues change in the most natural manner.

Have you noticed the colors of the sky and the clouds…the dawn, the dusk and the dark clouds?

Gray may be a drab color but it keeps us riveted till thunder and lightening shake us out of our reflections. Its association with rain makes it all the more meaningful.

Gray also defines our romantic temperament!

Green, the most soothing and harmonious color binds us with Mother Nature. It emits positive vibes of growth, giving, prosperity and all embracing emotion. The exquisite attachments it creates are eternal!

I wonder how it fell into the hands of jealousy. Shakespeare’s ‘green-eyed monster’ doesn’t relate to the upbeat vibes of green color.

color quoteBlue color carries the vastness of the sky and the depth of the oceans, it breathes serenity and contentment and its shades merge all the emotions of fear, hope and trust.

Blue evokes divine blessings and infuses us with unflinching confidence when we say… ‘Sky is the limit’!

“Red is such an interesting color to correlate with emotion because it’s on both ends of the spectrum. On one end you have happiness, falling in love, infatuation with some one, passion, all that. On the other end, you’ve got obsession, jealousy, danger, fear, anger and frustration.” – Taylor Swift

Red has been my favorite color… how it got associated with danger, fear and anger is difficult to understand as red roses symbolize love and passion.

It is the most vibrant color that helps us thrive, the color of our blood, symbolic of life and energy.

A bride in Asian countries wears Red, which is the color of celebrating new sensitivities and relationships.

Red carpet welcome denotes honor, respect and grand reception but at the same time a red card or a red flag changes the whole vibrational frequency of this color!

The meaning and significance of many colors change according to places, cultures and circumstances.

The paradoxical uses of white are amazingly enigmatic.

White may be a color of purity, faith and innocence but it is worn at the weddings as well as funerals!

Black is as perplexing as white as it represents different meanings for people, occasions and cultures. A symbol of grief, it is also preferred for formal parties with great penchant.

When the night is black, the silvery white moon illuminates it with its unique color…its emotional appeal reaches many hearts and inspires the poets!

Yellow and orange, the beautiful colors of fall, of Sun and sunshine… a symbol of love, happiness, hope and heat. They blend into the blue to create a heavenly mesmerizing scene at the beginning and end of each day.

Ironically, they are also associated with fire, denoting danger but it was fire that introduced man to new avenues of progress.

Do you know we have only three primary colors? Red, yellow and blue.

All other colors are created from the combination of these colors. They are mixed and muted to create various shades for summer, winter and spring.

Do you know colors can change our emotional responses and our appearance? They can make us look happy or sad, heavier or lighter, romantic or boring!

If you want to see a riot of colors, visit India. Some of the states like Rajasthan, 532740_10150932713366007_1354189198_nPunjab and Gujarat are a living example of the brightest outfits, worn without any second thought.

Tulip gardens too present an outstanding specimen of how much colors attract us and affect our emotions.

What are your favorite colors? I have always loved the shades of pink and red and magenta. They keep me buoyant all the time!

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Thank you for your support. Please add your valuable comments, they are much appreciated.

Balroop Singh.