Category: Emotions
Are Memories Timeless Treasures Or Learning Experiences?
Memories are those endless treasures, which we can keep exploring till eternity and bask in their glory like a slow swinging hammock!
Like Ellen Hopkins, let me ‘open that bottle of memories they’re pouring out like wine, crimson and bittersweet.’
We can completely get immersed the moment they start pouring out!
Heartwarming memories, some sweet, some bitter and vivid, long-lasting and precious…unforgettable fond memories, haunt us if we happen to be sensitive as they have a profound connection with our emotions.
Some memories stand before us with extended arms, ready to embrace us lovingly…the first crush, those hands ensconced into each other’s, those amorous glances…that walk in the rain, huddling together…the touch of your new born child, the most precious possession…myriad such moments are stored effortlessly in the mind’s eye.
Happy memories yearn for those times to return, resist and resent change.
Unhappy memories are tenacious, they get entrenched in our minds retaining their ghost like exterior… they can tear us apart with their piercing, menacing eyes.
Repressed memories get embedded in the subconscious mind despite our best efforts to shove them out.
Sometimes I have to close that inward eye to stop the reel of memories so that they bounce back into the subconscious mind.
Sometimes I hear those loud voices…let go…forget the past…detach, I dump all those memories and choose only joyous ones yet they keep returning whenever the connection emerges.
One of my colleagues had a magical eraser, which didn’t leave any mark on the sheet. Sometimes I wish such an eraser could be invented to expunge unwanted memories from our memory bank!
Have you ever thought why certain memories keep coming back?
Have you ever wondered why certain facts, songs, statements or situations can be recalled without any effort whereas important information or textual details have to be read again and again to recollect them?
Psychologists have called the former as implicit memory and the latter as explicit memory
It is this memory, which is called implicit that holds our moments…moments of delight, of exhilaration, of accomplishment, of pride and countless such emotional instants.
We hold them in high esteem, clutch them as if they were the only possessions worth
keeping and derive pleasure out of them during our hours of solitude. We keep interacting with them till we realize their material nature.
They come with a large baggage, which we refuse to give up!
“Forgetting isn’t enough. You can paddle away from the memories and think they are gone. But they will keep floating back, again and again and again. They circle you, like sharks.” – Sara Zarr
They also come with some profound lessons if we are ready to discern and digest:
- Childhood memories are the strongest reminders of love and affection. Handle children with care.
- Don’t invest all your emotions in one person. Memories of such a person can drain you.
- Attachments are aching reminders of fond memories.
- Dwelling in the past is futile as it retrieves painful memories.
- All people we meet leave an impact on our life. Avoid negative people as much as you can.
- Memorable people affect us deeply with their qualities. They give us good memories.
- Earliest happy memories convey life-lessons of happiness and relaxation, which are picked up from parents and siblings.
Memories are like roses of various hues in their raw form, thorns are the natural attachments unless we scratch them away. I have embraced all the shades and tones and learnt from each one of them. I had no choice.
During the prime of our life we keep gathering them, unaware of the thistles, which start piercing us as we mature.
I have a very vivid childhood memory of a thorn, which pricked me, broke and got embedded in my finger. I came running to my mom, crying and wondering whether she could lessen my pain. She pulled the thorn out mercilessly, without caring to be soft.
I wish this memory too could have been pulled out as harmlessly as that thorn!
But memories are etched permanently on the canvas of our mind.
Do you have such memories? Have they been your learning experiences? I would love to hear your views.
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Balroop Singh.
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How I Reached That State Of Mind, Which Is Called ‘Meditation’
I have always cold-shouldered meditation, considering it to be another way of prayer. Probably I didn’t understand its meaning and had no faith in its healing power. I couldn’t believe that it can actually train our mind to think positive, to calm down and enhance the power of concentration.
Probably I had no time to sit quietly at that phase of life.
I always thought that the stream of thoughts flows incessantly. How can it be harnessed by meditation?
Stressful situations could never impel me towards it as I could handle them quite well.
Though meditation belongs to antiquity, there has been much ado about it in the modern times. So I have always been contemplating and waiting for some leisure to get acquainted with this practice.
When I heard that it could lead us to “inner transformation”, I must confess I felt the urge to try it out. However, it remained an unshared reverie for a long time.
Now I have been practicing meditation, a long nurtured dream but it still plays hide and seek with me. I have been trying to peep into the inner recesses of my mind and lately I seem to have made a break through.
Despite various suggestions about the ways of meditation, everybody has to discover one’s own way. And I did but it was a long, obstinate journey.
Meditation in natural surroundings has helped me at last.
The track I have been taking along a creek is blissfully peaceful; even the water produces a very soft sound.
One day the vibe of this creek and the trees reached me. That was an irresistible call. I sat by their side and closed my eyes. I could immediately discern deep connection.
The encouragement:
The visions that I perceived encouraged me to reconsider daily meditation.
Everyday I sit by the side of this creek and let my negative thoughts flow into it. Sitting there has helped me understand meditation. The leaves, the birds, the morning sunshine and the breeze support me in the percolation of positive energy into my body.
Most of the analysis I indulge in happens at such a time or when I go for a walk. So I start with my usual evaluation of thoughts and concepts.
The concentration:
I start with hands on my eyes like a child who is unable to close the eyes till s/he is overpowered by sleep.
I close my eyes to concentrate on the most recent thoughts till they fade into background. Do they? Oh no! Sometimes I wish this advancement of technology could invent a switch to turn our mind off!
On some days, when I close my eyes, all I can see is the yellow light, refusing to let me move beyond that… those are the days when mind is encircled by negative energy.
A little improvement is made when that yellow light turns into red and then I can see a tunnel of red light moving very fast but the moment some sound is heard, I am back in the yellow glow, struggling once again to move ahead.
It is like prodding into the unknown land in circles, coming back to the same spot.
On some days the frustration wins and dissuades me from even trying to sit at the place I chose to meditate.
I tell myself… I am wasting my time but there are days, brimming with positive energy which rekindle the fire within me to restart.
The breakthrough:
My persistence to explore the obscure tunnels of mind paid off and now I have developed some resistance to the loud voices, which try to disappoint me. Now I have realized that meditation is possible:
- By controlling negative energy
- By letting it pervade all around
- By giving it enough space and time to disintegrate
- By waiting patiently for concentration to settle on you
There was a time when external forces and sounds could shatter my concentration. Just the singing bird could divert my attention and I opened my eyes, losing all I had accomplished.
Now I can continue into that corridor which keeps widening, the more the span of concentration the wider it becomes, giving a sense of strange satisfaction.
And then that corridor opens up. I find myself in an open area with trees all around quite different from the ones I see and sit with.
I realize that it is not a state of blank, empty mind. It is more like developing a relationship with your reflections.
While meditating my mind is teeming with fresh thoughts. I find a strange connection with this solitude.
Only when we experience a particular state of mind, do we get the pleasure.
Everyday I drift into that state when I am trying to meditate.
It is now getting easier, more meaningful and blissful.
Do you meditate? How did you learn it?
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Balroop Singh.
Emotional Shadows 